INTEGRITY IS SPELLED D-A-D

As I write this, it is 3 days before the 20th Father's Day without my dad. He died in 1996 but not before passing on to me and my brother a set of values, ethics and morals that garnered him respect and adoration for all of his 72 years. I can only hope to have carried them into my life with as much ease and grace as he did and that my kids have seen fit too integrate them into their lives as well. There are certainly worse legacies to leave for their kids. I can point to dozens of examples that prove my allegations and to scores of people who knew and loved him and will, without hesitation, back me up on this. But, there is one story, in particular, that has stuck with me throughout the years. It's a tale of selflessness and humanitarianism that stays with me, top of mind, wherever I go and whatever I do. It makes me both proud and humble as I try to live my life with the integrity I learned watching him deal with the twists and turns that we all have to negotiate throughout our lives. My Dad sold furniture and office supplies. He began, upon returning from WWII, selling pencils and books to Uconn students at the college bookstore. It paid the bills and, eventually, propelled him to the stockroom at Plimptons, a stationary and office supply store in downtown Hartford. He was a quick study and, with diligence, was soon moved from the stockroom to the main floor. He was selling pencils again but, this time, rather than college books, he was pairing them with all manner of office supplies and, ultimately, office furniture. Over the years, he became an expert and, with his incredibly outgoing personality, built trust filled relationships with all the right people. He was furnishing entire office buildings from the insurance companies in Hartford to the offices of Electric Boat in Groton. Everyone knew that if you needed a chair or a desk or a lobby full of couches and tables, you called Jerry Brett. He was friendly, funny and loved by everyone and he always gave you a great deal. The buyers knew it and the manufacturers knew it. He had been with Plimptons for more than a decade and a half and was thriving when the store was sold to Litton Industries and he was “downsized” out of a job. Not only did he not panic - he didn't miss a beat and kept up his daily routine. He got up at 6am, took a shower, put on a jacket and tie and went to work. What had been getting in the car and commuting 30 minutes to the store in Hartford became walking across the room, picking up the phone and trying to find a job. Looking for work had become his full time job. A job that lasted for nearly a full year. Paying the bills got tough but,with the help of my grandparents, he was able to keep the lights on and food on the table. My parents were brought up to “pay it forward” and were always there when I have hit rough spots in life just as I now try to do with my kids. My dad was having trouble finding work but kept all of his contacts and, eventually, decided to open his own business. With a partner (who later screwed him and left him with nothing.....but, that's another story) became a furniture manufacturer's representative, basically cutting out middle men like Plimptons and selling, for the manufacturers, directly to companies for their offices and buildings. He opened a showroom in Hartford and did quite well. Before long, he had opened showrooms in Boston, Philadelphia and Chicago as well. Through hard work and tenacity, he was back but, as inspirational as his actions were, this story isn't what inspired the awe with which I jot these memories down. Dad had just begun his new venture and was in his favorite clothing store picking up a few things to help him “dress to impress” potential customers, when he saw a guy he used to work with on the other side of the store. H went over to say hello and learned that the guy, who had been “downsized” at the same time as my dad, was not having much luck in finding steady employment. His wife was sick and he had $50 bucks in his pocket to try and find a decent jacket to wear on job interviews. My dad saw him eyeing a very nice jacket that had a $100 price tag. After they were done chatting, my father, as he was walking out of the store, grabbed a salesman, shoved $50 in his hand and told him to tell his friend that the jacket had been marked down to $50. He then went home and made a few calls, one of which helped get his friend a job. The guy never knew. I never knew either. Nobody did except my his wife.....my mom....who shared it with me after he was gone. Morals, ethics, values, integrity.......that's how I learned to live by watching my dad. I only hope that I have been able to successfully convey, to my kids, the importance everything I learned from him and that they pass it on to my grandkids. They say that if you wanna know the measure of a man – look at his kids. I hope I have represented well.