JUNK MAIL

As long as there is still mail delivery, there will be junk mail. You don't really spend much time going through that stuff, do you? But every once in a while, one of those little trash can fillers catches your eye......like the one I got last week.          The mail came in an envelope that stated, in bold letters: “Free Prepaid Cremation! Details Inside.” - They had me now - On the inside of the envelope was a postcard, of sorts. It said that I could get a $300 reimbursement on my cremation service, free grave space (which is not very much if you’re cremated. A small hole should do it.), a free granite or marble headstone or bronze marker (also not a very big one in conjunction with the size of the hole.) and spouse benefits, whatever they may be (maybe ½ off a bus ticket to come for a hole-side visit and a free donut before 11). Then came the kicker on the other side of the card: “Cemetery Space is Limited”.....Whoa-I know the Boomer generation, to which I begrudgingly belong, is getting older, but, if this is true, we must be dropping like flies. These prepaid cremation solicitations are starting to show up in more mailboxes on a more regular basis as cemeteries are running out of space at a faster clip.      On the back of the card, towards the end of all this free stuff, it says, again in bold letters: “Return the Reply Slip TODAY.” This is where I make the conscious decision to start being more aware of my junk mail. Who knows what I've been missing. After all, this very important communique now has me better prepared for my impending demise. Somebody apparently knows something I don't and, with information as important as my final resting urn, I'd like to be privy. Follow me on Twitter @BobLeonardRadio and visit Bob Leonard Radio on Facebook.